I believe that God has been taking me through a new uphill season recently and I am so blessed for that. He has been challenging me and encouraging me in ways I have never been before. I feel like I am able to better understand who I am as a child of God as well as a leader in the church. He has been doing this by giving me new revelations and convictions.
Starting a couple months ago for the first time ever preaching started to become challenging. Preaching has always been something I loved and have been passionate about but recently something just did not feel right. I felt like every Sunday became a cycle. To the point where it became a task and almost felt like a performance rather than being used as a vessel.
So for the past month I have been in prayer and desiring clarity and provision. Starting last Sunday God answered my prayers and has given me the guidance I have been needing. He has challenged me to do something new.
Ever since I have been preaching every Sunday I have had a certain routine in which I go about when preparing my sermon. I go through the week praying about what He ants the message to be about and during the end of the week I write up my sermon points on Keynote and follow that during my message. So for my sermon I always have set notes and key points I follow.
This isn’t necessarily bad but something I have realized is that I feel like I get restricted to my notes when I preach. I tend to only focus and emphasize on the words and thoughts I have written down that I forget to leave room for the Spirit. Because of this restriction I feel like I am giving my words and not God’s. So God put me up to a new challenge.
I have started to try something new and different for my sermon preparation as well as my delivery methods. Instead of writing up my sermon and following it like a manuscript I have started something I haven’t really done before. After I pick what I feel like God wants to speak about on Sunday, I spend all week long just meditating on the scripture and praying about the message He has put on my heart. Then I just jot down some notes and revelations He gives me throughout the week on my phone and then continue to think about and meditate on those notes. Then on Sunday when I give the message, I don’t use any notes, rather I just remember what He has spoken to me personally and deliver the message with my heart.
I have been able to fully allow God to move and work through me without me trying to speak about the things that I want to, rather ask His spirit to move completely. Today I was able to witness the freedom that comes for His spirit. Not being restricted to any notes, or my words, or the things I have prepared but instead just being free to be used by God.
Yes, at first it felt really difficult. I felt unprepared and very vulnerable. But through that God moved. He has shown me that giving a sermon is delivering a heart piece instead of words. That heart piece is not from myself but from Him and I need to allow Him to speak. It is the greatest feeling to sit down after a sermon and know that it wasn’t myself speaking up there but it was God. I bet anyone who preaches can agree that you know it was a true message from God when you, the one giving the message, actually receive a message from God during the sermon.
God is amazing and He is alive within every one of us. He has blessed us with the Holy Spirit and through Him we find power and freedom. It isn’t about us moving but it’s about the spirit within us doing the work.
I saw God today.